Tuesday, November 13, 2018

Nov 13: Friends for a season

We all have them, right?
People that we were once close to, but now we have no contact with them and nothing more than a few memories in common.
We may have been supportive of them in the past, or maybe they were the one that helped us. There was no catastrophic event that separated us. We have just grown apart. The things we used to share are no longer important to one or both of us, or maybe it is just time and distance that now separate us.

Old classmates, former co-workers, former church members, old neighbors, ...
All of these and many more.

Social media and the amazing World Wide Web have allowed us to stay in touch longer than we would have in the past, but does that really count as maintaining a friendship? I have greatly reduced the contacts from my social media friendships in recent years and I have been reducing my presence on some media even more. I find that less social media time is better for my mental health and overall outlook on life.
I have a number of social media "friends" that I have never met in person and sometimes wonder if I would like the real person as much as I enjoy the person I know from the internet. I also wonder how differently they might perceive me from my internet profile vs the actual me.

Anyway...
Back to this friends for a season theme.

How do you know when it's time to just let an old friendship go?
It's probably easier when you are the one moving on. You just move on and don't look back.
But what if they're the one moving on?
Do you keep making attempts at contact or do just hold on to the memories and let them go?
When do you decide that they have moved on and that it is okay ... for both of you.

Yesterday was yesterday and today is today.
Give yourself permission to leave the past behind you and live life today.
Our communities are constantly changing. Some people stay with us for a lifetime. Some are only here for a season. Some people we wish would stay longer. Some, we are happy to see go.

When I reverse that lens, I wonder how many people (or how few) would have liked for me to stick around a little longer and how many were (or would be) happy to see me go.
There is little we can do about the past. Perhaps we need to make a few apologies or say a few thank yous. There is plenty that we can do about today. Live it well!

John <><

2 comments:

Elvis Wearing a Bra on His Head said...

Sound advice, John. Let's consider internet friendships as having a time and place too. I count your as one who offers sagacious views.

John A Hill said...

Agreed!
I enjoy my internet friendships.