Sunday, November 04, 2012

Facebook Wisdom

You and I both know that there is a great deal of information and misinformation that finds its way to the grand social medium of Facebook. Sorting through the piles of manure to find the gems of truth is a daunting task. Fortunately, one of my Facebook friends has done the hard work for us.

He posted this as his status and gave me permission to copy and paste it to my status. In giving his permission he said, "Copy, copy, copy away. I hope it gets a million hits."

I few others have copied it and posted it as their status but it deserves to be read by many more people.
To make it easier for you to share, I'm posting it here at Out of My Hat. You can simply share this link so that everybody can benefit from the wisdom that he has gleaned from the postings on Facebook.

Thanks to Facebook, I now feel very well informed as to the issues our nation faces and the basic differences between the big parties are very clear. So the summary of what I have learned is: If I vote for the one guy we will have no jobs, outrageous debt, become slaves to China, get nuked by Iran, dissolve the military, ban God, Bibles, and guns. Have all our problems instantly solved by raising 
taxes on a handful of evil rich people. People will have children just to abort them. The nation will be secretly run by Islam. George Carlin will be the smartest person to have ever lived. Gas prices will remain at record highs, but the earth will heal. The government will decided who gets to see the doctor and who doesn’t. Academic and financial achievement will be capped because everyone needs to be average. If you work you will have to support 100 who don’t. Terrorism will be defeated with warm smiles and free hugs.
Then there is choice number two. All the poor people will die instantly because there is a huge advantage to keeping the poor people poor. The rich will be, well, rich and pay less in taxes than a secretary. Birth Control will be illegal and Row V Wade will be instantly dissolved somehow. My black friends will be placed in chains. All women will be raped. Schools will collapse. Student loans will be outlawed. College will be a rich kid’s game. People will not be allowed to have abortion because we need more children just to make more soldiers to steal more oil. The earth will collapse because one more pipeline will connected to Canada. The nation will be secretly run by Salt Lake City. Gas will be $.87 again. Detroit will fall off a cliff. Starting a business is like becoming a slave owner. Grandma’s social security will be stolen to make more nuclear weapons. Banks will collapse, but not Swiss banks, because that is where this guy keeps his money.
But no one will do anything about illegal immigration, because they need that Hispanic vote to win.
What a world we live in. Happy voting, Tuesday.

John <><


Mike said...

Well at least there's one true thing in all that... 'George Carlin will be the smartest person to have ever lived.'

Anonymous said...

In my opinion--any attempt at humor that includes references to rape and slavery (two separate references of slavery) has a very low probability of achieving it's goal.

It doesn't work for me.


eViL pOp TaRt said...

That's how the two parties paint their primary opposition. Surely, they lie like dogs. I'm totally sick of them.