I've never been a real fan of the term deconstruction to describe the evolution of my faith.
I get it. I certainly had to tear down and remove much of the bullshit that was nothing more than the rules of men and the control of religion. But I didn't just bulldoze everything and rebuild a faith or belief from scratch. It was (and still is) more of a remodeling project. Certain underpinnings of my previous faith remain foundational in my current beliefs and are what I am rebuilding upon.
One of the biggest differences between the religious John of the past and the more spiritual John of the present is that I am now more concerned about my own faith and relationship with my Creator than I am about the relationships of others. In fact, I really feel like your relationship (or lack of one), or your faith is none of my business.
I am more than willing to share my thoughts, beliefs, and life philosophies with you. And I am equally willing to hear your thoughts, beliefs, and life philosophies. I just no longer feel it is important to me that you convert to my way of thinking.
Growing, changing, evolving as a spiritual being is a full-time gig for me. Being nice is a daily struggle when my natural tendency is to be a snarky, sarcastic asshole.
Trying to understand and follow the teachings of Jesus seems to work for me, but it is an ongoing project. I have to admit, it's a little bit disheartening to think that I'm going to be changing constantly and never really complete the remodeling project of becoming the John that I need to be, but the work continues. Maybe I need a sign -- Please excuse my mess. Remodeling in progress.
John
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