Mi Familia

I suppose it's a pretty normal thing for siblings to have an ongoing group chat through messenger, text, or some other social forum. Although today's conversation isn't any big deal, it was interrupting my reading and is nearly impossible to ignore when my phone vibrates next to me.
I really love these people!

The other day I was asked if I have a favorite sibling.
Because each one of them is so different and I love each one where they are and as they are, it's impossible to rank them in any particular order as a favorite. But I've been thinking about that--not about ranking them, but about why I love them.

One might think that I love them because they are family, but I know too many people that don't get along with others in their families to say that family is a defining quality when it comes to loving people. While we don't get to choose our family members, we do get to choose our friends and these five people are among my closest of friends--because I choose them to be.

I don't know how my siblings see each other or how they see themselves. I thought I'd give a brief thought of how I see them. Each one is much more complex than I could ever put into a few words, so these ideas are far from a complete look into their beings or our relationships. And I hope that none of them takes any offense to how I see them if they see themselves differently. I love them all so much.

Theresa, the oldest.
While our household structure was pretty typical for the 60s, I don't think that traditional patriarchy plays a role among us siblings. I definitely see her as the leader. She set a pretty high bar for the rest of us to follow, both in her personal character and in her rebellious independence. She seems to have Mom's joyful spirit and Dad's more stoic one in pretty equal measure. I think she is respected and admired by everyone she encounters, but none more than me.

Steve
Even though I have said that I don't have a favorite sibling (and I don't), I often describe Steve as the very best of us. The weird part is that I don't know how to put into words why I feel that way. There is just this spirit and energy about him that says, "This is a good man, a good person."
His way is easy, wholesome, and independent. He loves nature. He loves life and is a fierce advocate for the oppressed and underprivileged. 
We are very different. I am fat, overweight, and out of shape. He's gearing up for a 50K run (and yes, that is 31 miles). He's vegan and I'm thinking about those leftover BBQd ribs for breakfast.
I wish you could spend some time with him. You'd come away as a better person, yourself.

Mike
Kind of an intellectual warrior. I always think of him as the most intellectual of the group. I also see him as steadfast and courageous. Although he has faced some serious health issues (both for himself and his family) you never hear him complain. He deals with life's adversities with an incredible spirit and attitude. He has an inner strength that is beyond my understanding.
And he has a great laugh! Anyone that knows him well knows that laugh and often recognizes his presence when they hear it.

Mary
I never use the word sweet when describing people, but it might be the best word I can think of to describe my younger sister. She may be the kindest person I know. If Steve's energy/spirit say "good person," Mary's says kindness and compassion.
I don't know how she feels about this, but I think that more than anything she identifies herself as mom. I've always thought that this woman just loves being a mom. Maybe part of being an incredible mom is being a pretty incredible daughter, as well. The compassion she has for others is magnified when it comes to our parents--both before Dad's death, and especially now in watching over Mom.
Her focus always seems to be on caring for others.

Pat, the baby of the family
In a word--overachiever.
Overachiever isn't really a good word since it has a negative connotation. Perhaps "driven" would be a better choice. His natural musical talents and leadership qualities have been enhanced by his education and service.
I often say that before Pat was born God had a moment of realization that he'd forgotten to give our family any musical talent and so he dumped it all on the last kid.
My quiet life and truly empty nest is a stark contrast that exists in Pat's world. In some ways I admire his ability to embrace the chaos (my word, not his), but that really isn't something I aspire for in my own quiet world. I feel like sneaking him away for a cigar and bourbon would be good for both of us.
If Mary identifies as "Mom," Pat identifies as Lolo (filipino for grandpa).

That's us in a nutshell.
Besides being an exceptional group of siblings, we have raised some pretty spectacular kids, as well. And there are already grandkids to populate the next generation.

I'm not sure why I felt like writing this today, but there it is.
To my siblings: You are the very best! I am so proud to identify as a member of this family. I love you all, so much more than can be expressed in a few words.

John