Advent - Day 4

I was glad to make contact and check in on a couple of friends yesterday. For one of them the contact was just a text for coffee today before a couple of morning appointments. 

I am a little surprised at the number of people that want friends but don't feel like they have any -- especially people my age. Most of you know that I'm okay with not getting together with people often. Apparently getting together with others is an often unmet need for people. It would appear that a simple text or call is helpful in reminding people that they are not alone. A "howdy" and a hug can make somebody's day.

I'm going to combine my Advent goal and my Wednesday Wisdom post with this simple encouragement:
Find someone that needs a "howdy" and a hug (and maybe a hamburger) and give it to them. Or maybe a handshake or first bump for those that are not huggers.
And if you are one of those people that wants friends but feels like you don't have any -- be the one to reach out and say "hi." Invite someone out for coffee or a meal. Be the friend you want.

Honestly, it's a bit of a stretch for me. When I'm sitting alone, reading a book, listening to music, or smoking a cigar -- it's never going to cross my mind to call somebody and see if they want to meet for a drink or something. This purposeful kindness stuff is an exercise in growth for me. I don't think that I am purposefully unkind, but neither am I typically the person that is naturally kind to others.
 
Personally, I do recognize a subtle difference between being polite and being kind. I think that having good manners and holding a door open for someone is being polite rather than an act of kindness. I do think that fewer and fewer people seem to have good manners, but I don't think that the civil act of being polite is the same as being kind.

That's too simple.
People say that being nice doesn't cost anything.
I don't know if that's true.
Not being mean doesn't cost anything, but that's not the same as being nice.
I think being nice takes effort, but maybe that's because I'm not a naturally nice person.
Ugly John is a pretty sarcastic, condescending asshole. It has taken a lot of time and a lot of effort to build a mental dungeon strong enough to keep him away from public view. I can occasionally hear the sarcastic shouts from the depths of my mind, but can usually ignore them. Sometimes, however, he manages a breakthrough. That's never a good thing. 

Be nice today.
Make the effort.
Make it cost you something -- time, energy, love.
Let's see if it's worth it.

John