This is the lesson I wrote for our Student Venues for the week. It follows along with Pastor Phillip's current study, mostly using his scripture texts and (hopefully) conveying a similar message. (Again -- sorry about the font. Also, the hyperlinks don't open in a new window so you'll need to use the "back" button to return to the text. Just an issue with the copy and paste from Google docs to Blogger)
There are a lot of things that cause family feuds. Some differences last lifetimes. A 150 years ago there were brothers fighting against brothers in our nation’s Civil War. Even in today’s very polarized political landscape we see great political differences that have viciously divided families.
Some family disputes happen in family businesses; some in dividing family estates. There are marital differences and divorces that tear families apart. Often it’s finances.
Dealing with a tragic death can destroy a family unit as can addiction or mental illness.
Sexual orientation is often the reason a person gets outcast from a family unit.
It seems so weird that God is also a reason that families fall apart.
But maybe it shouldn’t.
Both in church life and in society, we are taught that the family is the core unit. Destruction of the family is the beginning of our downfall. I do believe that the family unit is important and I believe that the Commandments teach us about honoring our parents.
But the New Testament has some contradictory stories.
In Matthew’s gospel (4:18-22) we see two sets of brothers that suddenly leave the family businesses to follow Jesus. This is a pretty big deal. It was more than leaving the business; they were leaving the family. Not only was Jesus okay with this, he was the one that told them to follow him!
What about Luke 9:59-60?
Maybe this was the case of someone telling Jesus that he couldn’t follow until after his father was dead and it wasn’t like the dad was going to die any time soon. I have a difficult time thinking that Jesus didn’t want someone to go to a parent’s funeral - but I don’t really know.
In Luke 14:25-26, Jesus tells us that we must hate our family.
What’s up with that?
Is this a case of real hatred or is it a comparison kind of thing like placing love of God so far above family that it seems like hate?
Have you ever had to prioritize your love for family against your belief is something else?
Politics?
Social justice?
Sexual orientation?
A particular person?
Religion?
Even though your choice doesn’t mean that you hate your family (or that they hate you), being on the short end of that priority stick certainly hurts -- a lot.
Jesus even said that families would be divided because of him.
So what happens when the family values of society or religion clash with the values of Jesus?
What happens when we see the values of God differently than our family sees the values of God?
How important is it that we see God’s way the same way that others see it?
Jesus didn’t seem to make a big deal of it. He taught God’s way and moved on. He didn’t demand that people follow him -- not even the members of his own family.
Jesus knew that he wasn’t always going to be accepted by his community, his religion, even his own family -- and he seemed to be okay with that. It wasn’t his mission to please everybody. He taught us to love as God loves us. He taught that God loves us without conditions. God doesn’t demand we love him first or even after he demonstrates his love for us. God doesn’t hold out his love as a bargaining chip or something to be earned.
I don’t know how you compare total love. I don’t know if you can.
Is it possible to love God completely and not make that your most important love? Can we love our family as much as we love God or is it possible that we may have to make a determination of whom we love more?
Personally I believe that we need to focus on our love relationship with God. I believe that when we are in a right relationship with God it is impossible for us to be a poor son or daughter. We can’t be a rebellious child when we are right with God. We can’t be an unfaithful spouse when we are in a right relationship with God. We can’t be an abusive parent or a bully when we are in a right relationship with God. We can’t be a lazy employee or a manipulative boss if our relationship is right with God.
I’m not talking about following church rules or checking off religious boxes. I’m saying that when we understand the love of God and choose to love like God, our other relationships flow out of that.
Will that make it a perfect world?
No, it won’t. Remember that the religious leaders of Jesus’s day worked to have him arrested and crucified. Love isn’t easy.
But there is a peace in knowing that you are loved by God and doing your best to love others the way God loves you. It is a peace that is beyond our ability to understand or express.
It is my hope and prayer that you find this peace. John
"Often it’s finances."
ReplyDeleteIt's always about money.