I have mentioned (on many occasions) that I am a slow learner.
Take faces, for example.
We see faces and we identify people by the distinct features of their faces and how they look.
Sometimes, faces can tell us how people feel -- happy (smiling), sad (crying), angry (tense and red) -- but some people tend to hide emotions better than others. We wear our masks like a second skin and show ourselves to be what we think people want or expect us to be. Often times, we are nothing like the person we exhibit to others.
I guess that's okay.
I don't need to share my problems with everyone and I'm not really interested in knowing everyone's problems. But we all need people that we can be honest with.
As I've gotten older (ugh! I hate that phrase), I've started to see through the masks a little more often and realize that most of us are hiding something. Many have hurts and struggles that nobody else knows about -- not even the people closest to them.
Many years ago, I received a call early on a Sunday morning. It was a young man from my Sunday school class telling me that his wife was leaving him.
They were in church every Sunday. Their faces and dispositions didn't show any marital strife to the casual observer. They appeared to be like everyone else.
But I had to ask myself, "How did I miss this?"
The masks!
At some point it occurred to me -- they appeared to be like everyone else!
Was everyone wearing a mask and hiding their hurts?
Isn't church supposed to be a place where we can be free of judgment and open about our struggles?
How is it that church people feel alone, suffer alone, and add loneliness to their lists of hurts?
I had a recent conversation with a young man that spoke about the false relationships found in churches. One of his complaints about churches was that people seem to care, but you know that they really don't.
Hmmm...
It has been said (and usually attributed to Plato), "Be kind; everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle."
A friend recently told me that I was the only one on a ministry team that ever called to ask, "How can I pray for you?"
I think I need to do that more often and for more people.
In life's battles, people need to know there are others that will stand with them for a while; that they are not alone. They need to know that there is a place of rest; a sanctuary -- even if only for a moment. And they don't have to share the details of their journey if they don't want to. I just want them to know they are not alone -- You are not alone.
My contact info is available.
You can send me a message via comment. I moderate comments so just mark it as personal or mention that you don't want it posted. I know I'm just a guy at a keyboard in a virtual world, but even so -- You are not alone!
John <><
John, that is wise advice.
ReplyDeleteMany of us hide the hurt because we're in denial.
If you ever need a place to vent, feel free to text or email.
ReplyDelete"...be free of judgment..."
ReplyDeleteWouldn't that be nice.